December 4, 2018

Tonight I heard that actions speak louder

Flying fast down the road

wondering how I can possibly get myself to run in a wall that could eventually put a halt to all of this

but instead I keep going

letting everything build on top of each other. 

Questioning why me?

why do I constantly feel that I’m never good enough

that I have to strive to be perfect in everything

Because I was chosen and not born

Constantly trying to convince the world that I am the way I am because that’s who I’m supposed to be and i’m not hiding under a painted face and perfectly set curls.

Trying to show the real me ends up being harder than fooling the world

And here I sit hoping to find my peace where the lost things go.

Remembering it’s useless to hope because hoping doesn’t get you anywhere unless you do something about itBut I can’t move. I’m stuck going a million miles a minute with no wall to break my speed

thinking I have to hide the invisible tears